Saturday, January 17, 2009

I Didn't Think He Would Fit

First, it's the night Lucy's tooth almost pushes through - she cries and cries. She won't hardly nurse - just cry.

Then, it's Janie calling loudly from across the way, a bed change and me bleary eyed. I freak out, then, hold, cuddle, snuggle, it's okay, it's okay.

Somewhere between her wad of covers stuffed in the washer and fresh jammies fumbled from her drawers, Jack is on the bottom bunk blowing me kisses. One, two, three, kiss-kiss-kiss. He's just laying there on his side kissing the air. He rolls over, goes back to sleep.

I stop, hold Janie.

"I hope you know how much I love you, honey."

Pause, "I don't"

"Maybe you never will because it is so much."

"I think I will because God is really big and he is living my my heart. I didn't think he would even fit. His hand is bigger than the sky." But he did.


Goat said...

That photo is awesome--the mesh of hair, the single braid with a perfect curl. And most importantly, the red rubberband. I love the way her jawline is so simply represented.

Compassion for Emma from you-- despite it all--welling up from under the tasks and from Jack to you like spilling all the stars from heaven. The more you give, the more you get.

Lori said...

Natalie: I want to play with Emma!


We'll have to work on that... Your mom is so wise! I love reading her comments.

Ben and Rachelle said...

well, not sure what happened, but I did write a comment to this the other day... not sure why I don't see it. anyway, i said something like this:
AWWW! Your kids are so awesome and your are an awesome mom. I also love the photo. I love how you are always able to capture these simple moments.

Heather said...

Her understanding and love for God is AMAZING to me! What a gift! I'm so glad you are documenting all of this.